I am not the only person who finds the Feb. 19 “Ask Millie” column problematic. And while I don’t speak for everyone, here is a by-no-means-comprehensive list of what I find problematic:
1. Virginity is not “the other big V.” Virginity isn’t a big anything; it is a construct that supports systems of oppression.
2. The erasure of anyone outside the gender binary, asexuals, and poly folks. ‘Nuff said.
3. Slut-shaming is not cool. People who have sex lack neither “self-control” nor “self-respect.”
4. The expectations of sex are problematic. The idea penetrative sex is “full on intercourse” and the end goal of other sexual acts is not true.
5. I do not “gift” myself to anyone or “lose” my bloom or personhood upon having sex. I am a person, not an object.
As a women’s college, it’s not becoming of us to promote the very issues we struggle to live in and dismantle.
Regards,
Stephanie Der
