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Letter to the Editor: Virginity Response

I am not the only person who finds the Feb. 19 “Ask Millie” column problematic. And while I don’t speak for everyone, here is a by-no-means-comprehensive list of what I find problematic:

1. Virginity is not “the other big V.” Virginity isn’t a big anything; it is a construct that supports systems of oppression.

2. The erasure of anyone outside the gender binary, asexuals, and poly folks. ‘Nuff said.

3. Slut-shaming is not cool. People who have sex lack neither “self-control” nor “self-respect.”

4. The expectations of sex are problematic. The idea penetrative sex is “full on intercourse” and the end goal of other sexual acts is not true.

5. I do not “gift” myself to anyone or “lose” my bloom or personhood upon having sex. I am a person, not an object.

As a women’s college, it’s not becoming of us to promote the very issues we struggle to live in and dismantle.


Stephanie Der