Sunshine Anderson, Ghost Interpreter and Mills College senior, led the self-initiated Mills Ghost Tour on October 18. Anderson is a Mills College History major, father-figure to the college rowing team, and part-time ghost doula. Since their sophomore year, Anderson has faithfully collected stories of paranormal experiences, oral and archival.
“Heck, I could talk to dead people,” Anderson remembers thinking, and delved into old newspaper clippings and library archives like a proper-gay Nancy Drew. Anderson then parlayed those materials into a tour on ghosts, such as that of Ethel Moore. Moore, a ghost alleged to haunt the halls of her namesake building, was a housing advocate at Mills.
As a condition for funding and housing the idiosyncrasies of Millsies for generations to come, Moore’s stipulations included that a library be built in her honor. However, disregard for the wishes of the dead caused plans to fall through, and a study was built in the dorm to appease her, according to Anderson.
Unfortunately, the ghost of Moore remains dissatisfied to this day, according to Anderson, and continues to haunt the students of her domain.
“She makes books fall off the shelves, turns pages. Doors open, lights flicker,” Anderson said. “She’s pretty classic, but it’s mostly book-related.”
Naia Adams, a first-year who stayed in Ethel Moore over the summer, recounted her experiences hearing Moore play emo ghost music on the piano. Conflicting reports have said that the music may also be Eve Scarborough, a prospective English major and second-year student, tickling the ivories with her tears.
Miss Moore was unavailable for comment on these allegations.
As a Gemini (Geminis are known for their duality), Anderson claims to have found unlikely friendship among dead people, a far cry from the life-long humanoid companions one is expected to find in college.
“Every time I move into a new dorm, I introduce myself to whatever spirits are present, as well as make it clear that I mean no harm,” Anderson said.
Anderson has even gone so far with the olive branch, usually during midterms and finals, as to leave out their textbooks when not in their dorm, just in case the ghosts want to help with homework.
“Turnout is incredible this year,” said Anderson in the main lobby at Warren Olney, where the ghost tour began. Within minutes, at least sixty students had congregated, and the excitement appeared to be palpable.
“I literally just watched a video today about ghost fetishists,” Hannah Powell said.
For a seance held by Anderson, a poll administered during the tour showed that 69% of students in attendance would prefer to be “spooked” over being “body-snatched”. Authentication for these data are unsubstantiated by any research facility of merit, intellect, or common sense.
Out of all self-identified lesbian couples surveyed at the tour, 100% expressed spiritual, emotional, and physical satisfaction with the level of flagrant homosexuality exhibited on the tour.
Asked how the ghost tour rated on the Eleanor Roosevelt Lesbian Date Scale, so named after the alleged lesbian and former First Lady, Sasha Powers said, “I would say a nine out of ten, because I just tripped over something in the dark and [my date] caught me.”
Anderson’s mother, Jennifer Anderson, identified as Duchess Jennifer of the Wisconsin Dells for the evening of Halloween fun, was also in attendance. Jennifer Anderson said that she recognized Anderson’s true calling as a ghost doula when they were young.
“They used to talk to the spirits and babble in their crib,” Jennifer Anderson said. “We lived in a house with a lot of spirits. It made them more attuned to it, I think.” When asked whether she herself was a ghost, Jennifer Anderson replied after a protracted silence: “No.”
Students and tour staff both expressed that they were spooked and inspired by Anderson’s tour.
“Sunshine is the best boss I’ve ever had in my life. Last year, I played music at the ghost tour and after calling Sunshine ‘Sunshart’, I was brought on to the team,” Mel Miguel said. You know how hackers who work for the CIA get hired after hacking the CIA? It’s like that.”
Much like the CIA, and the US government’s alleged propensity for spying on its own citizens, Sunshine’s ghost tour is here to stay… and scare the heck out of you.
